Category Archives: humor

Who Knew?

So, like most singleton people whom have not had children, I was apart of “those” people that could not stand the Facebook statuses of friends’ children who talked about “their child finally sleeping through the night” or “going potty for the first time”. I often would comment to other singleton friends about, “who gave a rats ass about the kids? I did not friend the kids did I? Where the hell is my friend’s profile pic?? Why the hell am I looking at the baby???”

Furthermore, I come to realize that I hated to go out with my “mommy friends”, these people ONLY talked about their babies. And would look around me searching for other mommies to further talk about the naps and car seats. I hated it. Sometimes, I would get an apology or they would just continue to talk about things I knew nothing about while showing me pics on their phone of their babes.

It seemed as if when they had their babies, these friends would morph into another person, something I could never understand.

Then…. it happened! I had my son, and I got it. My whole life shifted and enveloped into naps, patty-cake and Elmo’s World. No longer was I closing the bar and making late night pizza orders.

One day I was uploading all my pics that I had just taken of my son, thinking about who would “like” the latest of my treasures and coming up with some witty titles to said pic, when I realized, I have become “that person!” I searched through my past updates and realized as I read things such as… “can’t ¬†wait till I can sleep through the night”, “just had a pooplosion, ewww”, “someone is 6 months old!” that I had indeed become “that person”.

I have now entered “the club”, this club is for the cool cats, is very exclusive and it feels good.


What is the deal???

I just read an article about a woman giving birth on a plane and leaving it behind. No one knew about the delivery! I repeat, NO ONE KNEW ABOUT THE DELIVERY!!! Many things disturbed me about this article and here they are:

  • Did no one have to go to the bathroom and noticed it was “occupied”? I know that when I have to “go”, I always wait and see which one of the two stalls are available to use. Furthermore, I notice when people don’t come out of it. I keep mental note to NOT go into the one that has taken a long time.
  • What did the people in the back of the plane think was going on in there? Personally, I would have thought someone was dying in that stall and would have said something to both the person next to me and the flight attendant.
  • Really, How sanitary is an airplane bathroom? I am thinking of a little club that goes by the name of “Mile High Club” and no I am not a member.
  • Can giving birth cause you to become a mute? Have you ever confused the Hospital delivery ward with a library? It’s been my thought that I would want to die and/or kill someone while giving birth and that yelling vulgarities at anyone within an earshot was a done deal, screaming in general is a given. We have all seen the movies and know someone (I mean how did you get here), have they ever said to you, “Painful, nah, I barely even made a peep”.
  • The woman left her baby behind. Did she think that the baby was just luggage and she would be picking it up at baggage claim? What was she thinking?
  • A little thing called an umbilical cord. How the hell did she get this detached from herself? I could not even bring my nail clipper last time I boarded a plane. What is she the female McGuyver? I mean really, what is the deal?

So those are just some of my thoughts on the issue. What are yours?

Here is the link to the original article: